Guest article contributed by Julie Foucht, The Art of Feminine Business
I remember the first time it happened.
I was sitting at my desk, staring at my computer screen, wondering, “What the heck am I supposed to do today?”
All of the tasks on my to-do list were done. My team was taking care of the critical pieces of moving my business forward. My client’s needs were covered. I had scrolled Facebook and interacted, checked my Instagram and I was done.
Suddenly, the busyness that had been a constant companion for most of my adult life had disappeared.
This wasn’t an accident.
I had been working toward this, building a business that was financially abundant and that also gave me lots of spaciousness.
Yet, in our society, being too busy is a badge of honor. We take it to mean “I’m important”, “I’m valuable to all these people”, “I’m needed and loved”.
The dopamine hit of saying “yes” becomes an addictive drug that fills our calendars, leaving us less and less time for self-care, play, and daydreaming.
You know the value of self-care. There are a million gurus constantly telling us to “make time for self-care”. Self-care then becomes just one more of those tasks to check off the list before you fall into bed too late, only to get up the next day too early and do it all again.
Play gets slotted into the 6 days you take each year to vacation, where the mandate to “have fun” becomes yet another way of staying too busy.
When busyness becomes the norm, we lose our ability to connect with the Divine.
It is within the spaces between our busyness that Source speaks. Where we hear the whispers of new ideas and creative solutions to the world’s problems and our own challenges downloaded, as if by magic.
It is in the spaces between the doing that we experience our deepest growth, where we transform into who we were born on this planet to be. It is within the spaces that we open our channels of receiving so that more money, more acknowledgment, and more success can flow with ease.
On the day that I gave up my brownie points for being so busy, I went for a walk in the woods behind my home. I felt the energy of Mama Earth flow up, supporting me, grounding me, nourishing me.
I had a conversation with the Energy of my business. I listened to what it was longing for. For the next evolution of my work.
I felt into my hearts’ desire to discover what was really important. And I dreamt about how to make all that happen. Creating space has become a defining practice for my success.
It requires that I say, “No” often. Yet, as women, we are taught not to say “no.”
We are told that we should help out, lend a hand, drive the kids to soccer practice, write that report while waiting for piano lessons, volunteer to be room mom and plan the office employee recognition day. We are taught that good women do it all, all by themselves, and never, ever complain.
Until we do.
Because our bodies can’t take the pace and create dis-ease to slow us down. Until our souls get tired of being ignored and our joy disappears. Until we finally say “enough.”
And then, my friend, we become magical.
To say “no” you must take space to consider the “yes.”
- Does the thing you are taking on bring you joy?
- Does it contribute to where you want to be in life in five years?
- Do you honestly have the time and headspace to contribute?
If you cannot say “yes” to all three questions, you must say no.
As space begins to open for you, notice what thoughts run through your head. Notice all the shoulds, all the “ought to’s,” all the doubts about your deserving of this time. Notice, then pat them on the head and send them out to play. (It helps to imagine the shoulds, the ought to’s, and the doubts as small gremlins. Very pesky and harmless when told to go play.)
Learn to relish the space between. Use it to allow your mind to wander. Begin to play the game of what if….
- What if my business looked like this? Or like that?
- What if my next project was this? Or that?
- What if I lived my life like this? What if I let go of that? What if I claimed that?
Forget about the “how to’s” for now. Simply dream.
As your dreams gain color and detail, they build energy. You’ll begin to dream the same vision over and over, each time you allow yourself to enter into the vision the energy grows.
Eventually, this energy becomes so big that you can no longer just dream. The energy takes hold and you move into action, pulling your dream out of the imagination and into the physical plane. Because you’ve built the energy, your actions have more magnetism, calling into being all kinds of help and opportunity that would not have been possible from the overwhelming, exhausted state of being too busy.
You’ll find yourself getting more done, in less time, because you have access to a storehouse of extra energy moving you forward.
You’ll find the spaciousness for self-care, and your days will become more fun as you learn to say “Yes” only when it meets the 3 yeses criteria.
This naturally built energy is sustained by repeated breaks, time spent dreaming within the in between spaces. As your brain adjusts to this new way of doing things, it creates new neural pathways.
Doing less, dreaming more, and creating greater success become habits so that the next time you check the last box on your to-do list of the day, you’ll know what to do.
Stop, breathe, connect, dream.
About the Author:
Julie Foucht is a business coach with a passion for supporting women to create profitable businesses that flow from their feminine essence. Through her feminine “sistermind” groups, premier coaching programs, and VIP days, she’ll help you re-awaken passion for your work and make a bigger impact.
Connect with Julie at:
Website: https://juliefoucht.com/
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