What do Mike Robbins and Barbara Hall have in common? This past week, both, through different means, each gave me a gift.
The gift? VOICE.
Here’s some context, to set the stage.
I once asked a coaching client, turned good friend and esteemed colleague, how she thought our work together specifically benefited her. She told me that my greatest gift was helping her to clarify and then voice her true goals and desires. Once she had that, it became easier for her as we challenged limiting beliefs and took the steps necessary to create the work and life she has today.
I did not expect that answer from her. Partly because having a voice to my own deep feelings and desires was not always the easiest thing for me to do. Still today, when I feel deeply about something, it can take me awhile to find the right words to express myself. (Introvert anyone?)
So, back to Mike and Barbara.
If you don’t know who they are, let me give you a brief background. Barbara Hall is the showrunner (read: she is producing, writing and editing the series) for the hit television vision show Madam Secretary, starring fictional Secretary of State, Elizabeth McCord.
Mike Robbins is someone that many of my readers or listeners may already know from his successful, although short, career as a baseball pitcher. After pitching in the College World Series, he went on to pitch for the Kansas City Royals until blowing out his shoulder in a career-ending moment. Today, Mike Robbins is more widely recognized as an author, organizational coach, and speaker. His two books, Nothing Changes Until You Do and more recently, Bring Your Whole Self To Work have already positively influenced thousands. Mike is also the host of the successful Bring Your Whole Self To Work podcast. I’m a faithful listener.
So, let me get back to how each of these folks helped give me VOICE this week.
For some time now, I have intentionally stayed away from talking about politics, and my personal political views. I’m not sharing them now, either. It isn’t because I don’t care, it’s because I don’t think people actually listen or seek to understand viewpoints that are not their own. We are so certain in our beliefs and our position of rightness that as soon as we hear someone differs and isn’t “like us” we turn off, disconnect, and name call (read: label).
Our ability to listen and discern, sort objective information from conjecture and opinion, seems to fall by the wayside, while instead we turn inward and begin thinking of all the reasons why “they” are wrong, and “we” are right. We are talking “at” each other, and not communicating with each other. This is not an abstraction. I’ve seen and listened to people I know, love and trust discount others’ views out of hand without asking more probing questions, never mind looking for objective truths and common ground. Friendships have frayed. Families have fractured, and labels, and excuses and blame are cast, further dividing us from one another. I have not had the words to express my deep concern for the path we travel together (which goes far beyond the current headlines).
That is why I was grateful for the words and sentiments shared by Mike Robbins in his October 9 podcast, “Can We Find Common Ground?” and Barbara Hall via Elizabeth McCord’s speech, E Pluribus Unum.
“We find common ground through vulnerability and curiosity, not self-righteousness.”
— Mike Robbins
Mike’s podcast covers a lot of territory, including gender, equality, and inclusion as well as a discussion around finding a common ground during times of intense polarization. He talks not only about having a VOICE, but also how important it is to really listen to each other, and then “find common ground from a place of authentic connection and vulnerability.” He recognizes that it’s easy for our own histories and experiences to cut us off from others’ points of view. It’s definitely worth a listen.
Barbara Hall and Madam Secretary
The show kicked off Season 5 with cameos from three previous Secretaries of State (Albright, Powell, and Clinton), each offering advice on what to share in a speech to the Nation after a terrorist attack on the White House. These previous Secretaries of State are not actors, so the conversations weren’t as smooth and practiced as we expect on the show. But the point (for me) was that seeking advice from those with different experiences, people not like you, can be a benefit. They can help you see and think of things from different perspectives. Then after receiving input, Tèa Leoni (as Elizabeth McCord) delivers a speech about unity, and the distinction between patriotism and nationalism. The premier episode of Madam Secretary divided a loyal audience, which seems ironic since the point of the speech was about accepting differences.
So how the heck does this link to the work of achieving your own goals and dreams?
Trust me, it does. To move from where we are and grow into what we say we want to do, be or have – to go after our big dreams and goals, we have to get honest with ourselves. We need to clearly look and learn about ourselves from others, so we can grow into the futures we desire. That type of work requires the vulnerability, curiosity and humility Mike Robbins talks about, and the ability to learn and seek the counsel of those who have stood where we are now, or who know a thing or two about where we are headed. And, we must be willing to listen and grow alongside people who we might otherwise dismiss or minimize.
Yoda says it so well, “Much to learn, you still have.”
Lessons and teachers are everywhere. Keep your minds and hearts open and listen with deep and sincere curiosity. That’s a pathway to your own inner knowing and the gateway to living a more coherent life.
Tag along as I write two more open letters this month, thanking folks that have shaped me and my story. #seekfirsttounderstand #lifelonglearner #neverstoplearning #findyourvoice #inspiration #lessonslearned #NLNLpodcast
