We set goals, we aim high, and we know where we want to be – but how to get there? And even more important, how do you really know when you’ve reached the end of your journey and completed your goal?
My business manager recently shared a story from a motivational speaker who keynoted at a Toastmasters’ Conference in her hometown. The speaker, Ed Tate, helped the audience visualize the path to their goals being like a “connect-the-dot” picture.
Picture your goal on a piece of paper, there are no guiding numbers to take you to the next dot. How do you advance towards your goal, with only (seemingly) random dots on a page. I’m certain we can all relate to the feeling of confusion he described when trying to connect the dots, no numbers and no final image to reference. The simple fact is we know the answer of how to get to the goal is there, hidden among the dots somewhere, but for the life of us, we can’t see what the big picture is.
The lesson: It’s HARD to connect the dots going forward. Try this instead, connect the dots going backwards. No, that’s not a typo. Stick with me here:
- First, we step back and take in the big picture. Assess our goals, our aspirations, our current direction in relation to our objectives to determine what our big picture actually looks like.
- Second, we compare it to our “known’s”, looking for similarities or related images in our brain’s databank. This lets us make quick comparisons about where we’ve been before and where we go next, ultimately guiding us in the right direction, on to the next dot.
- Third, we look for a natural ending of the dots (the goal), where things will finish and the objective will be met. Understanding what our end goal looks like is crucial to determining which are the correct steps to take. Simply put, if you understand where your destination is, it makes it much easier to get there.
Only after completing steps 1-3, can we attempt to successfully connect the dots. Oftentimes, it’s much easier to start at the end and work your way back to the beginning, connecting dots as you go. When we don’t have the luxury of numbers next to each dot to guide our way, it’s up to us to use our knowledge and experience to connect our own dots, crafting our own unique picture.
Another thing that can trip us up is focus. If you are not clear on your goals, you are setting yourself up for failure. When you ARE clear on your goals and they ARE compelling, start taking action, immediately. Don’t wait until you have all of the “how’s” figured out, because you never will. When you make progress or achieve milestones (like making it to the next dot), get laser-focused on where you are going next, and the “how” to get there will come naturally.
Here’s a BIG DON’T: Don’t focus on or worry about what you can’t control. Give yourself a break! Isolate what you can control and determine how to implement small, incremental changes to achieve your goals.
Look forward with motivation and block any possible retreats. Refuse to give yourself an easy way out just because you are forced to take an alternate route when connecting your dots.
Perhaps you’ve set some goals and have some dreams for your path ahead. A job change? A new phase in your family? A move to a new location? Count on the fact that there WILL BE many challenging dots, dots that will demand that you follow the three steps above: step back, compare, and look.
In a recent podcast, our guest Dian left us with a really great quote, ” I just think it’s important to always make sure that you continue learning.” How true that is.
Feed your hunger for knowledge, advance to that next dot, celebrate your wins (both big and small) and keep connecting the dots. When obstacles arise, and they will, trust that you can figure them out with the help of friends, family, coaches or mentors. If you’re feeling defeated, not sure where to go next or just need to bounce some ideas around, my inbox is always open.
